Gone again

So
i was sitting on the deck yesterday staring out at the valley
the beautiful light
i was a bit pissy
coz i’d dragged Leo down to town to pick up a package
thinking it was two packages
one from my mother
and one she forwarded from a psycho kid i know on NYC
but there was only one
His
and it had been put in isolation because it was leaking white powder…
Anthrax?
no- spirutein… a health drink
what was in this box?
i opened it:
Four burnt candles in glass
?
two things he’d bought for me
but he was so crazy
i’d just left them
and some health-food shake shit
that was spilled everywhere
and a book i had lent him
but not my copy
he’d lost that
along with all the markings i had made in it
some crap re-buy he gave me
gee- thanks
and… a clump of my hair.
i threw most of it away
some people just don’t know how to let go
so
feeling pissy
i call Kwai
coz when we’d got back he’d left a message telling me there was an opening in the dance…
he told me he was driving up the 101 and going to oregon
now, i was supposed to go down to Palm Springs with Leo and Rick this thursday
for a piss party
sex play
blah blah
but i really wanted to see Radiohead
but my brother didn’t get tickets
so
no concert
and i didn’t really feel like going down
this was perfect
everything seemed perfect
i told Leo
and he offered to take me to Ukiah to meet him
but then mercury retrograde kicked in
and communication broke down
and things got all a bit pissy
and he was telling me i was becomming so flakey
and there was anger
and patterns repeating
and the sun was gone behind the mountains
again
it was all going dark
and all i could do was rage through my confusions
Hello
where am i?
i’m in Oregon
Grant’s Pass
at an internet cafe
on the way to Wolf Creek
for the Beltane Faery Gathering
Yeah.
here i am
where are you
and who are you with
on the day where love is a ceremony?