day 19

once again
Woke Early
but this time
with the Phone ringing…
wake up call
simple..
i did some streatching
-re-organized my things a bit
took a shower
tried to get myself Vital…
the windows were steamed up..
and i loved watching an old man with a pick hacking away at the field
held in by the rock walls..
a beautiful sunny day, yes..
but i didn’t go have breakfast this morning
ate nothing..
decided i would fast a few days
had a cup of tea
and off we went
packed into the bus
and onto the airport…
beautiful views of the city
everything rolling past
farm fields
…
there’s this old Incan style of farming
where they dug ditches and made platforms..
somehow it stops the plants from getting frosted…
do they plant them in the ditch or the platform?
i would assume the former..
but i was too tired to ask.
when we got to the airport
we got by pretty hassle-free
though none of us were seated by the windows…
and the flight had to land in Cusco before continuing on to Lima
we said good-bye to Walter and Sulema after paying our airport tax
… all of us having given them their tips…
(tips… they get paid.. but all of us gave quite a bit of money for a Tip that culminated in quite a substantial fee…)
and sat
waiting for over an hour..
there were some incredibly cute guys..
and i had got pretty burnt out on taking pictures
.. mostly, in the last few days, i’d be focusing on taking pics of guys..
thinking of sharing them with Gene..
so cute..
anyway
the flight..
i read a lot of “Power of Now”
realizing he’d done a good job of trying to destroy the world and, more so, save it at the same time.
i wondered about friend’s relationships
asked
”
how did you choose your partner?
Are you using the relationship to bring yourself to further awareness of yourself?
is your partner?
… what are you using the relationship for?
— or — what is it doing for you?
— or– what is it doing?
”
then realized that looking at something consciously to attain a goal
was missing the point
so settled back into my sleepiness
we got into Lima
and i felt a little frustrated..
in our Day Room at the hotel
i quickly ran out
to check with Jackie, our day guide
to see what had become of the Stolen Camera deal…
she didn’t know anything about it
and said she would have all the answers at the end of the day
… as she told Judy and Poncho when they asked her if they had a room for the night.. seeing that they weren’t leaving tomorrow..
so i went up stairs to use the internet: there were four different guys i’d talked with on line that i could potentially meet up with today..
but the internet wasn’t working in the hotel
so i went for a walk
for a supermarket
to see if i could find Maca…
but found an internet cafe first..
so sat there
for an hour
answering profile messages on different sites..
sending emails
.. nothing definite had come through
back to the hotel
Jim asked me where i had been..
said he was hungry
let’s go eat
i told him i was fasting
he should have eaten at the hotel restaurant..
but we went across the street
and he got a beer
and one of the most beautiful club sandwiches i had ever seen..
i haven’t eaten one in years
but when lived with my parents
it was one of my favourites..
this one was with four pieces of white bread..
but had a fried egg on top!
tortured…
i drank Manzanilla (chamomile) tea…
we saw Bob (the 77 year old) go into the wrong hotel across the street
so i ran over to correct him ( easy mistake, it was the same company, same colour building… but across the street and diagonal a bit)
he came over and had a drink (of tea) with us
and told us of his adventures
.. just left the hotel and went walking
went buying
jumped in a taxi
came back..
he showed us the things he bought…
glass and silver sculptures..
a golden llama..
i said it was time for me to go
and walked to a pay phone…
tried calling the two guys i had numbers for
… one didn’t speak english at all
and the phone cut us off quicker than i thought it would
i put in another coin
and called the other
who either couldn’t hear me well
or couldn’t understand my english
loud TV noise in the background
.. the phone disconnected us..
i walked down the block:
we happened to be staying on Avenida 28 de Julio
and four blocks from our hotel
was a gay bath house..
i took a look at it:
inconspicuous
i walked back to the hotel to try and make those phone calls again
the first guy
… didn’t connect
the second guy
he explained he had his parents over..
it was sunday, after all.
so i went out
for a walk
up to the Kenedy Park (yeah, from that guy who got shot in Texas)
some market was going on there..
i bought two change purses for 8 soles each
much nicer than the tourist stuff i’d bought already
and cheaper..
then i found a super market
and they only had Maca in pills
and i don’t like taking herbs as pills..
so i walked on..
back
down
around

the Oupen Suana.
cheaper than i thought it would be
35 soles
no private rooms for rent
everyone got lockers
.. i felt a bit stand-outish
.. i didn’t think i’d find what i was looking for here
but i felt the feeling of adventure that i often feel when Leo talks about going to Saunas
” i had some time so thought i would go rest my feet… ”
good
hot steam room
hot sauna
i lay down in the steam room
and an older muscular guy lay down across from me and started playing with himself immediately..
then some thin young thing came in and stood next to me..
sticking his cock in my face..
i started playing with him
more out of experimentation than desire..
… the other guy got up and left
and me and the kid got to talking..
… he’s from San Francisco
well, he’s Peruvian, but has lived in SF for 21 years.
tells me to be careful: peru has a lot of the aids
tells me he’s a singer
… here to entertain in the many Casinos around Lima for the next three months..
has bleached hair
that experimentation is over
i walk from there to the sauna
and let myself get really hot
sweat
stretch…
then walk back to the private cabins area..
i try to go for the older muscular guy again… but he’s not having it..
some really tall beefy kid walks by me..
so i look into his room
and
grab crotches
i guess it begins..
and he’s nice
a bit of fur
thick, heavy balls
lays on his back the whole time
though he wants to fuck me
i’m not going to let it happen
though there is play
.. i get him off
and feel like just leaving..
but he kinda stops me.
we talk for a bit..
then he says “but i really have to take a shower”
oh
ok..
so it’s back in the steam room
back in the sauna
and there’s this kinda chubby kid who is cruising me
and there’s this tall skinny guy who starts talking to me
and then he’s all over me
not so much physically
that way, just a bit
little caresses
but he’s grilling me
talking about everything
not giving me a moment of my own breath..
eventually
i try and get rid of him gently..
eventually…
by walking away
he follows
he keeps asking questions
tries to kiss me
i walk away
i lay down in the sauna
he sits next to me and asks me if i like in the sauna
i tell him to stop talking with me.
i need to relax
when i get out of the sauna
probably a half hour later
i go to take a shower
and when i’m done
he’s there
and he asks me something
i don’t here
i just put my hand up and push him away (without touching him)
saying
‘ No ‘
i walk back into the booths area
and that young chubby kid is there
and so we start our awkward dance
and he’s totally a bottom
and i try and please him without compromising myself
.. i’m not really into it
but i go there anyway
and he gets off
and i just get all spun
i shower
i go back to the booths area
and get another tall beefy guy (who sucks his stomach in)
he grips me desperately
it’s just the touching
just the hoping he’s not alone
and we’re in the same room
on the same bed
as the last kid
and there’s kissing
and there’s that old kinda boring disconnected dreamy drama
and we’re faking it really well
til someone outside says something in spanish
and he says (hold on a minute)
and gives the guy his key..
we resume
and this goes on for a while
… skin contact is good
but i keep wondering why i’m doing this
eventually
i tell him it’s time for me to go
neither of us having cum
i go and take a shower
use soap
go back to the booths
some hot guy..
not looking at me
fine
this guy i just left passes me
with a cigarette..
i go back to the sauna
everyone’s talking
that tall skinny guy
a beefy hairy skinhead 40~50 year old German guy
who’s not interested in me
i go to the sauna
i’m laying down
i’m the door keeps opening
held open
damnit
i go back to the booths
i go back to the sauna
this stupid chicken with his head cut off
i lay there
and i’ve had enough
got and fetch my towel
(yeah, for you anthropologists: they give you a towel and a sheet… the sheet for wrapping around you… modesty, i guess. the towel for drying)
i shower
use soap
cold rinse
towel
wrap my hair
say good bye to the singer
nod at everyone else..
and leaving the sauna
walking down the street
i see this beefy bellied 30~40 year old dark skinned guy with a beard
he makes eye contact with me
then looks away
and trips over the pavement…
a few steps up
he glances back
i take that as a cruise
and wait on the corner for him to come out of the shop..
but he doesn’t look at me
.. he does..
i follow him on the other side of the street
less than a block
he opens his door
looks behind him (i’m out of sight of his glance)
he walks upstairs
closing the door behind him
i walk to the door
… he’s talking with his roommate
was i imagining that entirely?
a three way?
something violent?
frat boys in peru?
i shake the fog out of my head
and walk back to the hotel
and back in the hotel
the internet is working now
and i check
what?
i don’t know
i’m writing something
and a Brazilian woman turns to me and speaks in Portuguese
then Spanish
asking me if i speak english..
she’s amazed that i can type without watching my fingers
she can’t get over it
she keeps turning and commenting on it everytime she hears the tapping..
so i respond to some things
then head up to the room
… a half hour before we’re meant to leave for the airport at 9pm..
jim is surprised i choose to come back so late..
but what is there to rush for?
i lay down
oil my feet
change my socks..
we head down at 5 to 9
and almost everyone is waiting..
bob and jim and metche are absent…
J&P tell their adventure of needing to get another room
being moved across the street..
wandering around all day
finding a sports bar
showing american football
and serving Nachos and Quesodillas…
i pay the phone bill..
about 2$
then head out to the bus
drama ensues
mistakes from the desk clerk
standard mercury retrograde mishaps
… we don’t leave until 9:45
but no worry: the delta flight that everyone (else) is on
has been delayed…
the bus ride is insane
he’s going through a million tiny streets
a very different way than we’ve gone to the airport before..
and we’ve gone back and forth about 8 times at this point..
but we get there
we all say goodbye to eachother
and Jim and i go to check into our LAN flight..
no hitches..
in fact, our luggage is so light they can put both of us on one person’s allowance…
we pay our airport tax
and ..
going through the security checkpoint
they search my bags and find a metal spike with a shaman on the end of it ( i don’t know what it should be used for: i bought it for a hair stick)
and declare it a weapon of mass destruction..
i have no choice but to relinquish it..
Ok..
then onward to the waiting lounge…
where we wait for about two hours..
nothing much to report on that..
the large fat lady who i thought was a chubby guy
then realized..
would have taken pictures for Gene..
she looked like a cartoon..
i read “the power of now” for a while
but was too tired to be able to keep up the focus
& airports are all about cruising anyway
the fat guy who’s hips roll as he shops with his friend
the old guy with the grey beard
steel grey
tanned skin bald contrast
shoping
pulling at his ear
sleeping
the boarding is called at around 12:40
and
even though we both have two pieces of carry on
it’s not an issue..
the girl has to pretend to do the american extra security measures thing
so she looks through my bag..
i do not deign to speak to her
just grunt
and make hand motions
move onto the plane
put away the luggage
sit down
… and i think i’m asleep before the plane takes off