Also
today i wore blue jeans for the first time in many years… possibly 15.
i own a pair now
i bought them on saturday for 12$
Lee’s
my sole distinction for this pair was
button fly
they also have bell Bottoms
— i needed work pants
i bought them because they were the only ones button fly’s in my range
it’s been a long time since i wore Size W32
… i feel like they’re girl pants
they way the hug my ass
it’s kinda nice too
today i cooked some pasta
with damiana in it
and raw minced garlic
some sea salt
i boiled it to make a mess all over the stove
reduced it
it was good
i also threw some raw olive oil in at the end
(that is an ingredient, not just a functionary to fry the onions)
and garnished it with pesto
periodically through the day
i stopped to photograph things
we find many things interesting to photograph
today we emptied the attic
i even photographed myself in an old house-dress-coat
it was very nice.

Thanks to my new friend, lolitasir
i got news of an art show i had some fitting work for
— i applied and got in
Opening May 1, 2007 from 6 to 9 pm
Runs through July 28, 2007
Arena Studios,
407 Broome Street, Suite 7A
New York, New York (for those of you curious)
i’ll be there at the opening and would certainly appreciate anyone who can make it to show up!
for more, look behind the cut

i left the big island friday morning
last week
my intention was to move across the island
once i’d finished my month commitment with N&K
and live at another farm
where i would have internet access and electricty
the man who owns that farm wanted to meet me, of course
and doesn’t live there full time
so
because i have an “art opening” in new york
i suggested i fly to meet him on the mainland instead
so i could be there for my opening
the only good flight he could get
was the next morning
so off i went
i spent the weekend in the SF bay area
this man i’ve met has agreed to mentor me
… i’ve always wanted a mentor
and i believe he is the right person
per many a friend’s suggestion
the relationship is not sex based
he thinks and processes like i do
but he’s older
and much better/clearer at it
so he’s helping me sort through some of the lies i tell myself
— i’ve needed this for a long time
and being in my saturn return as i am
i am ripe for this treatment
(if i continue in this way.. .i’ll be blowing around the world for the next 28 years… if i survive that)
so we’vve got some plans in the works for me
as it looks now
i’ll be living in Vermont this summer
working on his farm up there
i will visit NYC occasionally…
and the midwest
in the fall
i will return to the farm in hawaii to live for a few years
(stationary-like)
and go to school
get my self focused!
so there’s that
the vaugeries of my plans

i’ve known for a long time how a kiln works
if you open the door when you’re firing your pieces
the process doesn’t work.
i realize a lot of what i’ve been posting here has been my standard journaling
which, shince i’ve been 14, has been about what’s going on internally
but when i post here
i’m making all sorts of little edits
and it’s fucking up my process
so i’m going to keep the door closed a while
i’m not going to be writing, publicly, about my internal process
like this post
this is the last of this kind.
.. so tehre will be a lot more private posting in here
Still
i’ll put up events and where-abouts
and the occasional rambling conversation scraps and ideas
restraint…
happy saturn return to you all.

i hardly ever use the word EVIL… but this is somewhere near the true meaning of it for me

…nothing important …

looking too deeply into something simply fun

just woke up… still, the details are a bit fuzzy… but i think there’s a gift in there

i’ve been there three weeks…

just what i’ve been hearing from the TV in the background…