drag kicking, screaming
DO IT, LIKE THIS
like this…
because he’s never done it before
and i ask him to
and he says “yes…”
surprised
but should i be surprised when he backs out at the last second?
no.
angry though.
here in the house
alone
today
got angry
felt these voices
starting to believe in smudging… serious
this house of kept secrets
smoking pot
avoidance
now he’s sick in bed
YEAH RIGHT, motherfucker
and since i paid him attention
he’s shut up entirely
i can’t help it!
sometimes i even try to be nice!
not often… not good at it, not interested
seeth, quietly
how to interract?
and why bother?
back on wings up to the hermitage..
wait.
it’s raining
give it a moment.
last night i felt like i lashed out
what mood was i in?
what’s in the house?
reading his post
it just sounded Stupid
silly
absurd!
don’t take your friend seriously when he’s being absurd
you know him better than that
punch him in the shoulder and tell him you will not play this game
keep dancing
keep walking on
keep playing
not this game where you’re dumb
coz you’re not
not this game where you can’t say anything, can’d do anything, always wrong
it’s a Dumb Game: NO
saying NO a lot leaves you alone.
even to dumb things.
gotta go throughd dumb things being a human
gotta.
dumb.
walk around this city
fine, dominic
be alone and angry
it’s raining
sure
they bears are arriving for IBR
go smile at them
be a lover
pretend to be a lover
something
something better than just angry
i’m just writing to get the anger out
it doesn’t deserve to be directed at anyone
but you can’t leave it in a box alone
have to do something with it
here
just this.
fine.
meanwhile, back at the ranch
i just went to Magnet to get my HIV, Syphallis and Ghonorrea/chlamydia tests
Yeah!
while i was there
i got a free shiatsu massage
gave him a 10 buck tip
give it away…
the guy testing me doesn’t think i have syphallis or ghonorrea
but he does think i’ve got infections in my body
but he thinks it’s just general winter fatigue and choughs and plane illnesses
yeah, ok
and the shiatsu guy said i’ve been masturbating too much
and have a weak digestion
yeah, i know
how do any of us take care of ourselves?
0 thoughts on “angry about being angry about it”
shamantraveler
The beat of mighty wings.
Isn’t it midnight in the other side of the world?
Do you remember the face of that pretty girl?
Hugs.
Namaste.
dominicvine in reply to shamantraveler
Re: The beat of mighty wings.
she’s SO beautiful
green skin
pink palms
i lust after her so much
but not for her body
but for her bohdi-chita
oh, who are you talking about?
shamantraveler in reply to dominicvine
Re: The beat of mighty wings.
At times I have wondered about the road that can only be seen with hearts opened, awakened.
I have wondered about the moment when we come back to our villages, and talk to our people.
I lived the moment.
I read your entry and saw you beyond your words. My words being limited means can barely hint as to what awareness I share in common with you.
However, one thing is clear to me. You have seen and lived things others cant relate to. You know the stuff miracles are made of.
No matter how much you try to share it with others, only a few will know it as well as they know themselves.
I speak of she of green wings
I speak of none at all.
I speak of you and of kindness pouring from your eyes
And still, I speak of none at all.
Mighty winds mighty wings,
I share with you a dream
and more than a dream, a breath of air
My friend, this dance of ours…
Yang, ying, yang ying… endless spinnings
should we meet?
Laugh with me and coyote over the southwestern hills
Lets open the bottle of absynthe in a mobile parisian pub
Fast for answers we allready know at heart
Scorch our judeo-christian umbilical cord
for the sake of a sweet tomorrow
and a glass of tangerine bliss.
Lets go on a crusade to kiss
and heal every soul.
Lets then go to the poles,
and dance for golden escathon
Perhaps eat a slice of apple pie
under the canope of washintons finest
And then smoke the sacred herb
In sacred company
While we steal kisses from the overworked suburban apostles
yet to be called on duty
yet to be awakened
yet to know what is there to be known.
I speak of you
I speak of none at all.
I call upon the wind
and recall the orgasmic sigh
and then again say your name
And smile.
Praise to you, pilgrim.
May the roads allow us to meet.
Namaste.
sxixuxt
oh man.
and how ever did he figure out you’ve been wanking it too often?
-jorge
dominicvine in reply to sxixuxt
he kept hitting a knot near my left shoulder blade
kept saying
“have you been carrying something heavy?”
well, yeah, my bag
( of course, i knew immediately )
“yeah, but on one shoulder or both”
both
“mmmm… no… something repeditive… what have you been doing”
well, when i’m on the computer i masturbate with my left hand
“oh, that’s what it is, that’s definately what it is…
Wait… You masturbate? WHY? ”
this from me being “hot”? or a “yogi” he knew i knew better than that
Yup.
“well, slow down”
hey man, slow down.
sxixuxt in reply to dominicvine
i’m developing intense crushes at an incredibly rapid rate.
2-3 a week.
i’ve been romanticizing the future and jerking a good 3 times a day.
my right shoulder blade is probably done.
when do you leave san francisco?
sandwiches at the park?
i’m in the duboce triangle.
-jorge