the Joys

i wrote this back on January 18th
after the Fiesta de los Osos
i wanted to write out the joys first
coz i didn’t want to sound like i was just complaining
and i did feel like i was in a funk
— i was going to write a long piece all about my experience there
but i’ll just make it short:
Bear culture just doesn’t nourish me
i felt alien
and had to do too much work to talk with people most of the time
everything felt disjointed and 2D
— it just isn’t my thing anymore
though i thank it for helping me come out
…
and now i’m going to be in the city during IBR
— will i go to bars?
will i participate in any of those shenanigans?
i dunno
i still find bears very sexually attractive
but.. perhaps like and ice-cream cone
very yummy
but i can’t live on it.
anyway
here are the joys from that period:
So
what have the Joys been?
i soaked in the hot tub at the hotel Once
with Frank Martin…
i didn’t put my hair up before i got in there…
i had just been swimming in the pool…
i told him i didn’t want my hair soaking in that water…
30% chlorine and days of bears…
i pulled it out and let it lay on the cement as i rested in the water…
but i’m a moving one, i move around…
and when my hair would fall off the ledge into the water
frank repeatedly pulled it out for me
such a gentleman…
a day later
he decided to go on the Nude hike with me (and the bears) to Tanque Verde falls
a desert with water running through it!
AH!
Running up rocks
playing mountain goat
day warming
more clothes coming off
bears…
half way through
got entirely naked (shoes too)
hiked the rest of the way like that
tempted to jump into a water fall
one of our guides (a hot scottish guy)
turned and didn’t say a word
just sign language: DON’T
awwww…
in Brazil it would have been OK…
naked men all around
all ages
laying on the smooth rocks
water bubbling below
three-way, four-way
climbing up more rocks
eating peanuts
out into the further field
black dirt everywhere!
fertile
grasses growing
“that’s from the fire…”
just a few months after i visited last in 2002
the desert went up in flame
Catalina mountains glowing for how long?
washed down into New Growth…
where Charlie led me through
telling me stories of his life and the men who had explored that nude beach
“and his dog came back around the corner with a Human Leg!
so i’m careful when going this way…”
uncut old farmer from New Hampshire (am i making that up? he’d travelled round the world… but been in tucson longer than i’ve been on this earth in this form)
just playing
rising
connecting
coming at the same time
i love that.
and walking through the grasslands more
we found BeanPole
a guy i know from the Faeries
yes
small world
police helicopter flies over
wave at him naked
he flashes his siren
HA!
and even though these big butch guys can make fun of me
they still love the smell of my musk
and nuzzle their beards under my arms…