(conversation finished after the call ends)
you will eventually learn to say
“there was some drama there”
instead of recapitulating some tedious story that has nothing to do with either of us
editing your self is only one of the many forms of discipline you could benefit from
and hearing you accuse yet another person from giving you attention
when you have been avoiding mine and his is just nauseating
we’re both tired of your blind and selfish actions
though I know a steam roller is ironing out your life right now
you will come to understand this fear and weight is a blessing
because it is inspiring you actually deal with some of your shot instead of continually putting it off
I felt the same thing when I was your age
trite as it always is
“it gets better”
and it does
and it gets difficult again later
but the simplest lesson you can learn from this may be
meeting the world at least half way keeps it from having to smack your lazy terrified ass into gear to get you to the place you need to be
you have a place in this world
and it loves you
just keep breathing and do you best to fucking show up
now sleep!
I’m going to!
I’ve been laying here naked for three hours playing solitaire on my iPhone whilst listening to Stephen Fry read me Harry Potter after a day of my old antics (three men! that’ll teach me!) and I’m exhausted
may our dreams bring us pleasures
and easy answers
to easy questions
.
:.: