there was a great storm last night mall night the thunder hammered branches fell rain fell lots and lots of rain i drempt of old friends are they dead now? they looked much better than when last i saw them i remember the passion what was the rest of the time? ”we should watch a movie together we should do coke together we should make love together we should sleep together i am just here to pleasure you” all the way out to Avenue O … i was in a forest sleeping next to someone hello old friend this one that one good as new good as any unique name name that's ok he didn’t sleep well i did though i kept waking all that noise and all that feeling … this morning i gave a good massage then went to Cataract Falls i remember going there often in my youth (maybe only once) i remember the water was low and walking out into the rock bed the holes from time time can be seen clearly cut through by water “the largest waterfall in indiana” (“oh, Owen: are you there. . . ?”) today the banks were swollen the river chocolate milk torrent there was a large tree perhaps the largest tree in Indiana an honor to be in its presence and trees that flower and a sense that things were “back to normal” and everyone suffers with what they have. . . even if / especially if it’s everything they want … perhaps my cold sore is getting too involved being “an angel in a land of sunshine” where freedom has a different meaning all i can do is witness and be model freedom to the best i can be free what is the beat use of my being? i don’t know yet but for now its just this