43.27

Stu responded to a description i put on my IG post about “dejavu” and delivering teeth 
saying it was like the beginning of a burroughs or bukowski novel
perhaps i am a writer
and everything i write feels like a piece?

i imagined
what would a book written by the blend of the two of them feel like?

an alcoholic and drug addict
there would have to be some strange supernatural thing 
drugs made from the teeth
some human trafficking about tooth extraction
. . . or dentists pulling teeth and my sister extracting something from the teeth to make some sort of mind altering substance
. . . but to cross it with pizza-gate insanity
it could be some sort of reduction of teeth that keep people young
but transforms them into mugwumps
reptilians?
lanky black shadowy figures
bilious cloudy characters
sinuous streatched out beings
or, perhaps they start growing fingernails instead of hair around their bodies
scales
teeth all over their head and arms
perhaps, like in the FALLs, it affected different people differently 

but live forever

all told in a deadpan, paranoid, hateful sort of way

. . . i suppose i could write that
but would i want to spend some time feeling so horrible? in such a horrible fantasy world?

no, but it could be a good project, a good test. . . a good experiment. . . an exercise. 

ugh, a horror sci-fi paranoia novel
exactly what i don’t like
what i’m tired of
oh, and fights of good against evil resulting in wars to save the world
that too
nope.
….

so i wrote 1300 words of a story
did some research
and then retired for the night 

why write it?
there is some sort of satisfaction to write all the hateful and paranoid impulses of the mind
”better out there than in here!”

maybe i will write more tomorrow