drinking?
the dark room
morning
we wake
we fall back asleep
eventually
the howling wind got us up
amazing at all the noise the wind makes
maybe it’ll be sunny today?
it’s not raining
but it’s so fucking windy.
Leo gets out of bed and draws a bath for himself
soaks a while
i lull in bed
when he gets out
i’m ready to get moving
he heads down stairs for a pot of tea
i brush my hair thoroughly
and decide today is a good day to wash my hair…
the oil has responded badly to the hard water in the cities here
my hair has felt gooey for a while
and i don’t like it
once a month
more or less
i get out my little bottles of shampoo and conditioner
i balance on my feet in the tub:
there is no shower curtain
and i scrub my scalp with shampoo first:
no lather even
then work on my brush
running my fingers in the nubs
trying to remove the gooey plaque
let it soak
rinse my hair
more shampoo
on the ends first
rinse it out
then again
then the scalp again
and beard
i think i got it this time
bubbles.
i scrubb the brush some more…
it’s working
the stuff is coming off
well, had i known…
rinse
murky water
ugh.
then conditioner
it feels good to scour my scalp
it feels good to massage it
to play with my hair like this
so rarely do i indulge
how come i’ve never had a boy friend who brushes and cleans my hair?
bob in london
for a few nights…
ah…
the shower feels great
soaping everything
clean socks
clean shirt
but everything else is the same
Leo’s back up
and we have some breakfast
the salami we bought yesterday
the tit cheese
the pork
the different breads
thinking we’ve got plenty of time
Time.
sunday
i want to be at church for the sung mass
i have enjoyed mass when they’re sung in latin
beautiful
and i don’t understand the crazy shit they’re talking about
and i don’t have to listen to the congregation turn into drones and repeat shit to them…
we get to the church
and everything is over
and everything’s closed
hmmm
Spring Forward!
our clocks did not automatically change
no
we missed it by an hour
so
now what?
we walk around a while
yeah
and then?
guess we could get some business done
we go out to walk around the city
and head to the train station
down through tight streets
old streets
shops
silly things
out of the old city
into the new city
fallen blossoms
ground covered
is that camellia?
it’s not a long walk
15 minutes maybe
something like that
no problem
train leaves tomorrow at 13:37 to madrid
gets us in at 21:32
we get our reservations and i walk around to use the toilet
ah!
they’re free here
but that guy isn’t cruising, is he?
nope
just a geezer waiting for the train
hmmm
alright
i piss
and my phone starts vibrating
who’s that?
unknown call
is that?
Yes.
it is.
Nayland finally called me!
he explains that Skype had not updated my profile til today
the last two days it had the old number
well
however
today mercury went direct
i’m glad i finally get to talk to him
i fall into conversation with him
all the way back up to the old city
as Leo and i walk…
all the tension i felt about communicating is gone when i’m actually talking with him
and we just natter on about things until Leo and i get to the Park
and though it had been a nice day til now
as we sit on the park bench
it starts to drizzel
starts to pour
so i say good bye to Nay
and Leo and i run off to the covered galleries
i go to the internet cafe with aims to make contacts in Madrid and further into Andalucia
so i have places to stay and people to explore with
— i’m feeling very insecure that i have fucking clue what’s going on after Leo leaves…
Leo goes off walking
to see the town on his own
have coffee
attend mass.
yeah
i’m there a long time.
with very little prospects
it feels so odd
like i’m Mining
so i say
it feels odd
it feels wrong
it feels desperate
and i’m a bit scared.
and i sit there til nearly 18:00
which is when mass starts
so i walk around a bit
and realize i have nothing to do til Leo gets out
so i go into another internet place to Mine further
Nothing
and get an SMS from Leo:
meet me back at the hotel.
so i go back there
and he’s not there..
and it’s not raining
so i decide i will rush off to the park and walk around, like i wanted to earlier…
heading down the stairs: i run into Leo
but i explain to him
and he says he just wants to lay down
so
no prob
i head outside
as it starts to drizzle
starts to pour
ok.
(fuck)
i go back up
take off my shoes
and lay down with Leo..
we lay in bed together for a while
listening to the rain
not long before he opens a bottle of wine
and i ask him if he’d like me to read something
he starts, “not another one of Eli’s scripts..”
no no, Brokeback Mountain
oh yes, yes
— i have the story on my computer and told him i would read it to him sometime on the trip…
so we settle in with some Santiago Tart.. some cheese cake… and some wine
raining out side
while i read him the story.
the story..
time passes, we’re carried around through those lives
it’s pretty good
i only want to cry at the very end.
sit in silence for a bit.
talk about it for a while
and then realize another project we’d been talking about:
a ring-tone for his phone for when i call..
he suggested a snippet from Bob Dylan’s “Boots of Spanish Leather”
the opening?
” oh i’m sailing away
my own true love
i’m sailing away in the morning
is there something i can send you
from across the sea
from the place that i’ll be landing?”
i suggested cutting off the last line
seeing that i wasn’t landing…
then we decided to listen to the whole song and see if there was a better bit
– the song playing in that little crooked attic room, rain falling. dim light.
we decided on the end:
“take head, take head
of the western winds
take head of the stormy weather
and, yes
there’s something
you can send back to me
Spanish boots of
Spanish
Leather.”
though there are a million beautiful lines from the song
that seemed fitting
shoes
i got it cut and converted and transfered to his and mine pretty quick
clever
he smiled…
now
the city
the town
out…
the wind still blowing
but maybe the rain stopped?
we needed dinner
but it’s a sunday night
is everything still open late?
first hope was the place right around the corner
and yes
chilly wet night
and no
they were closed
so we headed back up to the restaurant where Friedel worked
where we ate last night
sat in the same room
but tonight next to the pilgrim statue (fingers cut off)
tonight i got soup, and a half order of the baby lamb
he got spaghetti & veal, as he loves his veal
we had wine
and did not see Friedel
more mentions of things we should talk about
but now not the time
now
not
time.
so i said i’d be off to the internet
just to check
just to see
keep the conversations going
juggling
he’d get the bill
i’d meet him back at the hotel
but there was nothing of mention in internet land
the windy wet empty streets
back at the hotel
the day was done
we just cuddled up
drank some wine
and slept.
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